Today's story involves an abominable horror that is wasting precious space on the internet. It lurks through the web that covers this world, gorging itself on baseless rumors and idiotic theories. Formerly intelligent people are no match for this being. It presents itself as legitimate, unless you pay attention to its source of power. Many a soul has been lost to this entity... as well as a passing grade in a college sociology term paper.
This despicable disease of a web page is known as Wikipedia. It is home to the moron, the weak minded, the lazy, the crazy whack-jobs, the people who believe we faked the moon landing and Elvis lives in a trailer in New Jersey,the just plain dumb,... and a few unsuspecting yet curious web explorers.
Our story begins several months ago. One of my friends stated that golf is a sexist sport. I am a weak golfer, but I enjoy playing. I often see women playing golf and know very well that this statement is flawed. However, curiosity got the best of me, and I asked my friend why she had made that statement. She explained (not to me, but a girl standing next to her) that golf is an acronym, meaning "Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden". I could fly off the handle right now, as I'm sure anyone of sound mind would. However, I have to reach the point of this story. I held off the pithy comments rushing to my brain, and asked my friend where she heard this "crap". She said, "Wikipedia said it's true," as if that was the end of the discussion. I tried to argue but my friend and the girl next to me exchanged glances and went on about other things.
"Oh that's just women trying to get under your skin," you say? I say, "No!" It's stupidity among the general population. Stupidity for believing in everything found on the web. In general, web media is the biggest hodge-podge of mindless freaks created. These freaks have somehow managed to find time from their blogs (and yes I know this is a blog) to meet up in an unregulated "encyclopedia of knowledge" known as Wikipedia. And only brainless idiots use this as a source of reliable information. Basically, I could go onto Wikipedia, insert any comment (maybe that in 1999 Jessica Simpson contracted herpes), and fake a source for my factoid. Presto! I just made a truth exist to millions of morons willing to read Wikipedia.
I majored in history from a major university. As part of my major, I had to learn to discern illegitimate sources from those that could be trusted. Had I used Wikipedia as a source... well, let's just say I'd be cleaning toilets on the janitorial staff of that same college.
I will use the aforementioned story to show that Wikipedia spreads lies. The claim is that golf... which consists of all lowercase letters... stands for "Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden". This assumes that golf is an acronym. Considering the term golf has existed since (at least) the 16th century this is highly unlikely. Acronyms only reached a wave of high use in the early 20th century. If the people of the 16th century had not wanted women to play, why hide it in an acronym? They could just say, "Nope, all you lady folks gotta stay out. We don't like you playing in the fields with sticks and balls. That's men stuff." Seriously, It's the early Renaissance. Women are respected but there's no such thing as equal rights. Why hide the meaning of golf in an acronym (if golf is really sexist). My theory is the lie was posted during the whole "no women at The Masters" ordeal. Some unshaven she-male, angry at the fact her state government wouldn't pay to give her a penis, decided to change the purity of golf and posted this made up urban legend. Since anyone can post on Wikipedia, it makes sense. By the way, the respected origin of the term golf comes from the middle ages. Medieval Dutch called it something close to "kolf" which the Scots translated approximately into "gouf". This is fact delved from the USGA Library and the British Golf Museum.
Hmmmmm. Who do I believe? A recognized and respected organization and a real physical museum that actually studies things. A web page that allows anyone on the planet to post fake sources claiming anything they want to say. You tell me and I'll let you know if you are as dumb as you look.
The previous example should have alerted you to the perilous rope from which Wikipedia hangs. Granted, there are some truths on there. However that does not make it reliable. There will be plenty of kids growing up using this defunct web page as a truthful source. Heaven forbid, they might even be saying that Jimmy Carter was the savior of the United States and Thomas Jefferson spent all his time fathering slaves (don't even get me started on the crap about the "Jeffersons"). If Wikipedia-mania isn't halted, we will all be slaves to a young generation of dolts that believe everything posted on the net. Drop the net source and pick up a real encyclopedia.
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